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Showing posts from 2021

Mum, I couldn't let you go!

Every morning just before I wake up, I can hear you, Every night after I sleep, I can feel you. They say you will not be seen anymore, But trust me, I see you every moment in my core. So, mum I still couldn't let you go! Every small thing around takes me more towards you, Your hugs, your kisses, your shoulder is what I miss most of you. Those words and talks push me more to hold on to you, They say I need to now live without you. But, mum I couldn't let you go! Those unlimited talks I want more and more, No one else can be as close as you were. You were the one who understood me always, Your ideas on how to live life pushed me in many ways. So, mum I couldn't let you go! I keep scrolling through your photos all the time, But none of them come alive like your smile. I needed you in my every sorrow and happiness, Because life is tough and no one else can bring that easiness. So, mum I couldn't let you go!   You were the most beautiful and strongest woman I've ever see...

The rituals ultimately burn in fire!

The people live more in the world of spirituality than reality maybe because it's their way of bringing minds at peace. Being spiritual is good but being a religious fanatic who believes, follows, and dominates others to follow rituals is what I believe is something not right! Sexist traditions and rituals We all keep talking about feminism but we are far behind when it comes to our traditions and rituals. Don't we need to evolve them with time instead they become rotten on their way and lose all their importance?  Weddings are just a perfect demonstration of sexism. The women leave home and not men. Her parents have to give dowry however educated or successful she is; if not in the name of dowry then in the name of gifts but everywhere it's the same. The after marriage traditions of wearing mangal sutra, bangles, bindi, sindoor, etc or signs of being married are only for women. The men don't need a signboard of being married? The live-long fastings like karwa Chauth, T...

The story of a girl whose fear to be born echoes in every home!

  I mostly live in imaginations and dreams  I am beautiful, I am strong,  I am lovable, I am emotional.  I have my dreams, I aspire, I learn to adjust, I compromise. I suffer sometimes, I cry, I learn to live, I fly. I am not easy to have, I am blessed, I fill colors in your life. Who am I? I am a girl, I am a daughter! Many couples in this country wish to have daughters for sure once they get married. Many want me as their first child and many as a sister to their already born son. The husbands who love and appraise their wives dream to have a replica of her as their daughters. But having me is something in the hand of human beings? No, so I am mostly left in dreams because thereafter the real-life situation dominates!   Reality vs Dreams Ahh. I wanted to be a mother, yes mother to a girl! But everybody questioned why a girl? The first should be a boy because he will always belong to you and you can be assured that your legacy will continue with him and everyon...

Does gender-differentiation really calls for gender neutral parenting?

I was a kid though but always wondered why everyone's conversation and actions keep revolving around the son in the family. Once somebody gave me a bowl of four laddoos from my neighbor sharing the happiness that a son was born in their family. The other day we received another bowl but only two laddoos this time. After returning from school, I asked my mum why only two today if the reason is the same? She told me because today a girl is born in some house nearby. I was shocked as I haven't witnessed such behavior in my home even being brought up with an elder brother. This mindset of people pinched me somewhere inside and envying this I told my mum when my daughter will be born, please distribute 6 laddoos in each house. This may be a mere expression of gender differentiation whose roots are sown in our own homes only! 'Don't cry like a girl', 'Boys don't play with dolls and soft toys', 'Don't be loud else society will say the girl doesn't...

Daughters should hold their parents hand equally?

Children have always been special to parents. They are like the world to them and parents keep struggling to make their world more colorful and a happier place to live. They choose the best clothes and toys for them, send them to the best school in town, fulfill their wishes, care for them being awake day and night when they are ill, pamper them, help them to reach a stable position in their career, and above all they love them unconditionally.  We can say their life keeps revolving around their children no matter if it's a girl or a boy!   Daughter of one family and Son from the other ! Even  before she could learn to live life on her own, she got married to the son from another family and the boundaries of her world now were already pre-defined. The culture in the family, the way we should speak or dress, where we should go, which job profile will suit us or even we need to work or not, how we should follow and learn to manage home were all tried to be dominated in one ...

Are we gender biased when we always expect male member or fathers to be the first in the 'responsibility list'?

The word 'man' or 'father' sounds so heavy that it automatically builds up  an image of a person who should be the most responsible member of the family especially living in the patriarchal society of our country.   Do they have a choice? No, a man doesn't have choices. In most of the families around, a woman may choose not to work or be bound to do so but a man has to go out to arrange for the daily bread and butter. Whatever position they may be holding in their job, from a clerk to a CEO, they learn to lead, manage and create a balance! They make sure that not only the needs but the wishes of the family members are fulfilled at every point in time. T o bring smiles to your faces, they buy the best for you and cut short their desires. No, money is not the reason for cutting but it's their concern to give it away first to you. They think about fulfilling your wish list first and keep their own at the end. They are ok to wear that same shirt again to...

The person you love the most will succumb to terminal illness soon!

      Life and death are the two sides of the road every one of us has to travel but how and when is all that matters! It is not easy for me and maybe others to talk and discuss. But when we have seen losing our loved one due to some terminal illness, if sharing our experiences can bring some comfort even to one person who is suffering through same pain, we will be successful in our objective. When everything around had an exciting color and you were playing with them at your best to make a colorful life, suddenly an evil eye had to prevail with darkness.  Trust me nothing can be more painful when the person you love the most lies in an Operation Theater and a doctor comes to you saying " it's cancer" and the first thought that clicked was "everything gone"!  If I go on discussing the cancer statistics here, it will be shocking but still not that important to you or if I say every 1 out of 3 females develops cancer, you may still imagine yourself in the rema...

What does it take to bring up a confident and happy child?

  Even before a mother conceives, the family starts dreaming about the child she will give birth to! You start building up various imaginations. Finally going through the roller coaster journey of 9 months pregnancy and excitement for 'Mum to be', you are blessed with a new life; a baby to hold and love to the most. Does the journey end here? No, here comes the challenge of winning the race of best parenting. Every parent wants to give the best shot to it. They start giving healthy meals to their children, start arranging for all required things for them to grow happily, or start finding the best playschool or formal school in town. Most of the parents follow the same track as many others. Do you know what matters? Before a child steps out to a school, the parents become his/her first teacher. They will follow the way you talk, you eat, you walk, and everything you practice from morning till evening in your daily life. The children are very fast learners and will pic...

Is the society judgemental about our women counterparts?

With the various pressures that women face, what will it take for us to be respected for the choices we make? Women of our society are the most easily targeted section, for both the good and the bad, especially in our country. We do favors for her and we become generous with reservations to her. We help her succeed in every field, we praise her and mention the boundaries she has managed to cross with your help! All this, however, clearly shows that they are still considered weaker than their male counterparts – physically as well as mentally.   Both study together at school and college and always compete together to stay ahead but then, why is there a difference at a later stage? If a married woman is career-oriented, she may be seen as bossy and terrible at taking care of her family whereas men always take pride in going out to work. Most people think that she has to work to contribute to the family income but no one accepts that she is equally concerned...

The only Goddess I got to know in real life-Mother !

Being a mother is a beautiful journey, but the irony is that there is no destination to this journey. The journey begins with the sacrifices of a mother and ends with her sacrifices. We worship God but we have never seen him. If they exist, their worldly face on earth is our mothers whom we can witness in real life!  The day a woman becomes a mother, she becomes the Goddess who only gives and never takes. She pours in her selfless love for her children which no one else can ever do. She has to be strict at times and the decisions she makes for her children are always right though it takes an era to realize that. It's not always about her children but she keeps her every step in sync with the expectations of her family and within the boundaries, she has been given to act. It's our generation who can take a stand to break the boundaries set by society whether it's right or wrong but our mothers had respect for everything. They believed in making a path for their kids through ...